In a statement released on Z (formerly Bickerer), the Local Clouds Union has declared a strike from their official account, sparking region wide outrage.
In the statement, the Union expressed its regret and deepest sorrow over all the emotional, physical, and human losses caused by floods but also expressed its disappointment towards humanity for disrupting their natural cycle, first and then making them the villains. The union has ordered an immediate ban on rainfall and the evacuation of all clouds from the sky until their demands are met.
Their foremost demand is a reforestation programme, which the Union claims will be the best way to benefit the environment. Secondly, it demands flood management schemes from the government and financial compensation to those suffering from material losses, with 70% of the funds coming from the Union itself. Thirdly, it advocates for a complete ban on any kind of construction on active floodplains, suggesting that housing societies located at the banks of rivers Sohni and Heer should be shut down. Lastly, the Union demands a ban on social media posts that have videos of the rain and floods (or both) with the popular background music “Paar Darya De”. The public deems the last demand as unreasonable.
Reports have been received of decreased cloud cover across the region, and no rainfall is forecast for the next few days. The Ministry of Unforeseen Circumstances has announced a state of emergency, saying that there is a possibility of a drought and dangerously high temperatures in the upcoming hours.
Four top trends have emerged on Z, with tags like #JoHotaHaiAchayKayLiyeHotaHai (whatever happens, happens for the better), #QayamatKiNishani (Sign of the reckoning), and a small minority of hopeless romantics posting #KehetAagyaMeraYaarNaiAaya (the drought came but my beloved didn’t).
There has been a surge in the sale of artificial clouds online in stores like Almaari and glx. Half of the elite class have already boarded the flights to “safe” areas, while the other half are busy stocking clouds from these stores. Meanwhile, the Ministry of First Aid just announced a milestone achievement with a 110% decrease in flood-related casualties, as local newspapers report an exponential increase in deaths due to heatstroke and dehydration from the underdeveloped parts of the region.
Negotiations with the Cloud Union are underway, with hopes of reaching a settlement, preferably convincing them to inform the government about the precise volume of rain beforehand. Until then, the Ministry of Memes has requested the citizens to accompany their families for sightseeing these one-of-a-kind, historical cloudless skies while blasting the evergreen song “Jay Aasman Ich Baadal Koi Ni” on speakers so that memes can be used to support the economy until the conditions get better.
